Urgent! Our Cup is Empty!
(4 min. read)
I have been working on some self-care Art + Well offerings this week. It’s got me noodling to say the least! Here are some of my thoughts and queries:
Why do many of us perceive self-care as selfish or self indulgent?
Do we blur self-care with “treat yo’ self” pampering?
Are healthy routines the same as self-care?
Why don’t we follow-through?
What roadblocks get in our way?
How can Art + Well self-care help?
Authentic Suz
As I embark on my Art Well 4 Life business, I want to be authentic about my journey and struggles. Self-care is certainly a hot topic for me. So, of course, I am asking myself these questions about my own self-care practices. I hope this blog entry is helpful to you and that I don’t come across as preachy. That’s the last thing I want. I am in it with you. Here goes!
Urgent! Our Cup is Empty!
One expression that I learned a few years ago working with parents and caregivers at The Phillips Collection is: “you can’t drink from an empty cup.” Isn’t our empty cup an urgent concern? Why don’t we feel this urgency to sustain ourselves, fill our cup? We don’t seem to remember that the best way we can help others is to take care of ourselves.
Road Block: Seeking Permission from Ghosts
And yet we don’t put ourselves first and fill the cup. For many of us, it can feel indulgent. There is a push-pull with a fantom authority (parent, principal, boss) who judges self-care as selfishness when there are so many important things to do for others.
Self-care might be simple, but it ain’t easy
In a recent HuffPost article, psychology professor Emily Bilek shared the hard truth: “Self-care isn’t glamorous. It’s the everyday work you do for yourself. . . . It means doing things like having good sleep hygiene, getting a little more exercise, staying hydrated, taking medication as prescribed, etc.”
Permission Slip Zeitgeist
I think, as a culture, we are desperately seeking permission to take care of ourselves in these authentic ways. So how do we give ourselves permission to fill the cup--even ½ way full--if not to the brim?
One playful way to make self-care concrete and actionable is to write yourself a permission slip. This exercise was made famous a few years ago by Brené Brown. (See the ArtWell4Life.com Resources webpage for links to her PDFs.)
I recently googled “permission slips, Brené Brown, Pinterest.” Do you know there were 19,000 results--just for 2019? (There were 72,500 altogether!) More evidence of our deep desire to give ourselves permission, sigh.
A Pathways from Intention to Commitment
Brené Brown has said, "The heart of a permission slip is intention setting. . . It's the commitment that we are making to ourselves” I love this insight. It has been proven that intention setting improves our likelihood to follow-through. By writing down our intention and making it as concrete as possible (activity, date, time, duration), we are setting ourselves up for greater success.
For Stealth Strength: Weave in Tiny Creative Actions
After you’ve written down your intention, how can you deepen your commitment to it? Go from possible to probable? By adding tiny creative actions of course!
I am currently working on an Art + Well Permission Slip Circle (which I hope to publish this Friday). You write your permission slip in the center of the circle and then sketch a pattern of dots, dashes, shapes, whatever you like, around it. By drawing these patterns to protect your fragile intention, you stealthily engage your art-based brain and literally strengthen your bond with your intention. Think of a rope made up of many cords rather than one. Which one is more durable?
Hope you have a terrific week with some self-care moments sprinkled in!
Creatively yours,
Suzanne
#WhatWomenWantNow